sharesanders's Blog

I cant but to think about the single life vs committing to a relationship.

Looking through eyes that have seen both sides I am left to wonder how much damage does a bad relationship really do? How much damage does the loneliness of being single cause?

Let's say you've become accustom to the expectancy of that loving someone when you come home, or someone to cozy up to at night. You share your hopes and fears with them, you rely on them to fulfill something in your life and then for some reason that begins to fade. Or you may wake up one morning, leave the house as if everything is normal, peck good bye and a quick i love you as one of you races out the door, you come home and... they are gone. Be it they left you for someone else or were killed in a car accident on the way home. As tragic as that is, they aren't there and now...now you must deal with the elephant in the room or should i say the lack there of.  How are you going to move past that and if you do, how do you know you wont be jogging backwards to jump over those same hurdles down the road. I know, I know, there are many people who have moved onto bigger and better things..like those who are on their 4th marriage. Maybe these are the more resilient people, they could be completely naive to the severity of the matter or  these are simply the people that keep sacrificing what they really need for the sake of "anyone is better than no one".  When and how do you decide if the person is worth what will, in my mind, inevitably end in hurt and just another bag to throw on the back? How far does one go before they stop believing in happily ever after.

Shall we skip to the single-hood...

You come home and the house is exactly how you left it. No one has misplaced the remote, stolen your cell phone charger or ran clothes in the washer and left them there for you to switch over in order to get yours done. No one uses up the milk and puts it back in the fridge. No one calls you to ask how long until your home because they're starving and apparently cant feed themselves with out you.   No one blames you for their missing sock, or un-ironed shirt and you are never blamed for not reminding them of something they were supposed to do.

However, you come home and the house is so quiet you hear the fridge whirring. You have times where you sit at home and your phone doesn't ring once all weekend. No one wakes up next to you and smiles and or goes for breakfast with you on a lazy Sunday morning. Theres no point in cooking a great meal for just your self. There is no hope of an I do. There are no summer plans for a trip to Europe. There is no "5 years from now we should" 's.

How long can someone live so detached, so UN-invaded before the depression sets in. How long can you go without that welcome home at the end of a long day before feeling utterly detached and self loathing.

Which weight is easier to bare. Which set of issues is easier escaped. Why do so many single people wish for someone, yet so many are wondering why they are in the relationship they are in.

All I can conclude is how frustrating love is. How maybe we should all just start appreciating the good things in people and being more kind and loving. Everyone has it hard, the grass always looks green through the right colored lense.

You make me feel so wonderful

Right before you tear me down again

i wish you never had this control over me

but somehow I let you get the best of me



I deserve better than what you give me

I deserve better than 2 days a week.

I deserve to be the better half of you;

But that’s something you never want from me.

I don’t think you realize,

How your never loving me kills.

Or how when you don’t care if im around ?

How that distance destroys



Or how you always get what you want?

But are never around to think;

maybe this time I’m in need

I don’t understand,

How so much time…

Can mean nothing in the end.

When its done; its over,

There's never anything that can be said.